Derek and I had our own language as children and our parents would ask me to interpret what Derek was saying. This must have gone on for a few months but it didn't seem to hold him back as he learned to speak in English pretty soon.

We had a somewhat erratic early childhood both of us being witness to domestic violence. Many years later I asked him how much he remembered of that and he said 'quite a lot' but we never otherwise discussed it. Perhaps we should have done. It remained, however, an unspoken bond between us.

We each went to different boarding schools and the holidays did not always coincide so we did not see each other for the whole school holiday. Our respective holiday activities of foreign school visits, Alpine ski-ing, Scout camps, etc also kept us apart although I remember when I was about 16 hitch-hiking to Cornwall from Lowestoft just to see him during one summer holiday.

I'll always regret that he did not live within easier reach until after he had retired. For a short while when he looked after Boulton & Paul's computer suite at Norwich (in the days of a refrigerated and dust-free atmosphere) and lived in Oulton Broad we were close enough to each other to be able to go out for the occasional pint of Adnams bitter.

Once we had both grown up, left home and were married my overiding feeling about young Derek was one of pride. Pride in his achievements with a young family, a house way beyond my means but mainly his success in developing his own company in the computing world. He introduced me to the worldwide web long before it was a household name, before Windows existed. Later I was able to show off his expertise to my contemporaries in the holiday industry of Lowestoft as he developed a Gazetteer for holiday providers. Sadly it was to prove too advanced for many of our potential customers who would not be seeking online bookings for some years to come.

After he retired to Ludham we shared the clearing of our uncle's house in Oulton Broad for one day a week for many months. He was even then showing the early signs of the awful disease which eventually meant his having to go into care and he was more comfortable working outside in the garden than sorting through the house contents. His condition deteriorated and Tricia was able to find him a place at Broadlands in Borrow Road, Oulton Broad.

For some years we had developed a Christmas routine of buying each other some quite appalling presents, each trying to outdo the other. I think he won hands down and I particularly remember the singing fish.

With a tradition of buying each other silly presents after he went into Broadlands I gave him some solar powered waving toys for his window sill which seemed to amuse him.